Our brains control every aspect of who we are, what we think and how we feel. I’ve a history of brain tumours and I was recently diagnosed with a Grade 4 brain tumour. It’s typical, with this type of tumour, to experience personality changes. To no longer regulate and control one’s self; to have no impulse control. To behave outside of cultural norms - characteristics we always associate with artists. This can be a form of liberation of course. Had Augustus John not suffered that terrible head trauma at age 19, would he have gone on to live the extreme bohemian existence he did, travelling with gypsies and living a life of promiscuity? I was really lucky to see an exhibition of Augustus and Gwen John’s work at the Tate Britain way back in December 2004. The styles of the siblings were quite different - Gwen’s more restrained, Augustus’s far more extrovert. I still have a brochure for the exhibition in which Augustus is quoted as saying that he and his sister’s art was “the same thing really”. A revealing comment - often the person living with the brain trauma just does not see how it is manifested.
I heard about your situation only recently and was very sad to think of your life being impaired and the situation of your family. You've been an incredible tower of strength to us who rejected the lockdowns and associated restrictions. Your activism has really heartened many of us and I know that people have got to know of my work through your comments and recommendations. I am incredibly grateful and say a prayer for you every Sunday.
About AJ, yes, it really is a fascinating question as to what his future might have been had he not had that head trauma. I know that people talk about that in relation to Hemingway too, who suffered a number of head injuries during his life. His medical history no doubt played a part in his output but it doesn't explain away what I consider to be his genius.
Thank you so, so much for your kind words and prayers. Honestly, it means a great deal to me. I’m down here in Australia, a long way from home, and I struggle with all the classic ex-pat neuroses and sense of disconnection. The online community we have is hugely important to me and I’ve been moved by the warm wishes I’ve received. I don’t have a huge YouTube channel (just very a small one that focuses on art and popular culture), nor am I active on Twitter. I just float about this online community and I love to read, and comment on, the great work that is produced. I would like to make more content but, as is often the case with women, family commitments take up most of my time. And sadly I’ve been ill most of this year.
I think the power of art is often overlooked by the ‘online right’. I’ve great respect for yourself and John Dee for bringing art, especially modern art, to the fore. Dee’s series on Andy Warhol (on Academic Agent’s channel) was the best study of the artist’s life that I’ve ever seen. As you know, modern art enrages some sections of the right although, as Bowden himself pointed out, what we class as modern art has already been around for well over a century.
As you demonstrated in your video on Bowden for Academic Agent, it has immense power. Bowden understood that. He literally embodied it. The anger in his work jumps from the page and punches the observer in the face - ‘Against Greenpeace’, ‘An Apple A Day Keeps Fury at Bay’, ‘Too Many Turkey Twizzlers’ - he’s not exactly sitting on the artistic fence!
I’d argue that he couldn’t have been the firebrand orator he was without his art. I’ve been binge reading books on Bowden and his art whilst in hospital; it remains as powerful now as when I first encountered it.
I’m just finishing a long round of treatment for this tumour, then we have a break to allow it to work/not work, then my neurosurgeon will do some more MRI’s to see how things stand, Hopefully we have managed the problem for a bit longer. Often with brain tumours and injuries, the best one can hope for is to manage the problem and buy more time. I’m always reachable here on Substack or by DM on Twitter (I haven’t been posting but I do check DM’s). Please take care of yourself Alexander, it’s always a joy to read your work and comment with you. God bless x
Thank you, I’ve just been bingeing on Bowden so he was in my mind -apologies if I rambled on a bit!! Please take care of yourself, you can always reach me here, God bless x
This was so interesting to read, and I did not know John, Stuart, and de Kooning suffered in the ways they did. It’s a fascinating question that I have never considered and you’ve given me much to think about. Thank you.
Trying to separate art from a broad range of “mental illnesses” is, indeed, a fools errand, after all is it not true that true high art, at least in some of its greatest expressions, demands suffering? One would be hard pressed to call Dostoyevsky, Turgueniev or Torquato Tasso (or any number of writers and artists for that matter) “completely mentally healthy individuals” and yet they were not truly mad either, rather their suffering and their rather odd personality’s and minds gave them insights into the human soul that the more “well tempered” minds of the world maybe would have never grasped if it wasn’t for the commitment of the writers to place those thoughts and stories into the written words of books to begin with…
I think modern western society thinks too much and as a result understands far too little of everything, for example: they see “persons” that is individuals with actual personalities (even if “maladjusted”) and see that these “persons” don’t fit the idea of “individual” as the current society finds acceptable(that is a commodified and for all practical purposes interchangeable human) and thus the society deems what in any other age would be deemed an odd but otherwise normal person into a “mentally ill and unfit individual”, this goes from everything from artists, writers, and even the average person, this is a major reason as to why the modern world lacks the presence of many geniuses which in other times were rather common in comparison:
“Where are the good poems? The good artists? The great writers? The grand philosophers of our age?” You may ask and the answer is: “the poet has been miserable and on several opioids while working an office job, the dreams of the writer were quashed in high school and he now is nothing more than a bureaucrat, the artist who made good art was found to be ‘too antiquated and unremarkable’ by the artistic world and now lives in the street selling canvas to sustain himself, and the philosopher? He’s either in a cabin in the woods or in a mental hospital”
This was an interesting read for sure. I don't think that they had the proper information about many medical conditions in the past. Take Van Gogh for example to assume any of his actions had to do with Epilepsy alone is rather idiotic if you ask me. He was on very toxic medication that HAD to have had side-effects. I highly doubt the medication he was on is legal today as his conditions were treated with mercury, arsenic and iodine. They were EXTREMELY toxic and would turn ANYONE crazy. It was simply amazing that he wasn't even worse off if you ask me. He also did not have Epilepsy alone and many things probably contributed to his behaviour. His case is actually a rather amazing one because I simply cannot understand how he got through that being poisoned to that extent. Thats NOT mentioning the fact that many are scared of what they don't understand even today. Many fear the brain, which is interesting because there have been multiple cases showing that people who have had brain trauma often get better. Some show little to no reactions, some are in the middle, yet some DO become rather unable to do almost anything. It really all depends but to only think of that persons art is wrong. I love art, don't get me wrong there but a persons life matters too. These people should not simply be remembered for the products their art has created but what they lived through. The money that can be made by their art is wonderful but Lives matter too! That fact should always, always be noted. In my opinion, the fact that in many of these times, medications came with HORRIBLE life threatening side-effects should be noted and it wasn't here. You aren't the only one who has left that historical information out of the picture helping countless people to be judged by a society that fears what they don't understand. What they thought of as medication in Van Goghs time, we know today was poisoning. That should be noted, otherwise it makes certain conditions seem much worse than what they really are and increases the likelihood that those with similar conditions will be judged based on false information or a lack of historical facts. These people did not go through what they did to be remembered for their medical conditions alone. Even today, depending on your medical condition, man-made drugs come with side-effects. I know when I was growing up, I was put on medication that actually killed some and was taken off the market. I was lucky to live. That is VERY rare today though because side-effects are often less traumatizing to the human body. If people are going to note the behaviour of those in the past, they should note the fact that side-effects of certain medications also contributed in many many cases! If not, you are giving the public the wrong information because those today do NOT have to suffer as much as they did. Cases like mine are RARE as I had up to 100 seizures in high school and was actually on 3 medications 3 times a day. It's a great thing that I'm not that bad off today but that does not stop judgement. Sadly, I know from personal experience that those today should NOT be judged by the behaviour of those who suffered in the past. The medical field has learned at least some things so patients aren't poisoned to that extent. I wasn't even poisoned to THAT extent. Mercury, arsenic and iodine DO come with some HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE side-effects! It wasn't until the mid-twentieth century that mercury compounds finally fell out of favor, thanks to a solid understanding that heavy metal toxicity was harmful. You also did not mention Frida Kahlo who's health no doubt had alot to do with her works. Still, that fact did not make her works property of anyone else. Artists are people before painting, singing, etc. Even if art is infact the love of their life. I love reading about other artists but please for those suffering today, consider not passing on information that helps them to be judged.
Thank you for your insight, Angela. It is easy to become infatuated with technical explanations and to pathologise the creative process - and life in general - which can strip people of their agency. You are quite right that medication can easily have as many side-effects as neurological conditions.
Van Gogh's case is very famous and has been covered by writers more expert than me, so I decided to omit it and go with some lesser known figures.
I think I should do a few more articles in this vein and follow up some of the points you raise. Thanks again.
You are absolutely welcome. I would LOVE to read any articles that you may write on that topic. It's HUGELY interesting to me. To write about the differences or things they have found since Van Goghs time would honestly make your writing stand out. At least I think that it would. It would also help those like myself not to be judged as I tend to worry whenever my health acts up that someone will put me away. Although it's kinda obvious that I can infact think, trust me when I say that some assume otherwise. I remember that laws today would not allow anyone to put me anywhere without my permission yet I STILL worry. My point, you are right to an extent. Certain meds, treatments, surgeries can emotionally harm. You should see some of the art I created in the past. It's like Fridas, which I don't know if that's so good. She was, is and will always be a huge inspiration to me. I even made a self-portrait inspired by her painting Diego and I created in 1949. Mine is a bit different, I put a heart on my forehead to show my love of the world. My other works often show my progression from brain surgery in 2003. At the time of my surgery, I kind of doubt they even knew that a brain can actually heal. Only recent studies have proven that in many cases. I just don't get those works out all the time because I'd rather paint it and let it go. Here's a video of me talking about my situation Please note that this was years ago and I no longer attend that show. Even if it's free money wise to do so for those in my health, the fact is is they make money from the pity others show from it. I'd rather be known as the professional artist I am...anyway here it is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZptPQEgdiM I also post my therapy works on Halloween. As seen in that video, my surgery or at least ONE of them was not easy. I usually don't go into detail though. The whole point of that form of art is to heal from it. People don't know that they are based on real life unless I tell them anyway. Many find it too sad but in reality I'm not a sad person. It all depends on how you look at it. Again, you are absolutely welcome. The reason for my mentioning what I have is due to the fact that societies judgement has broken my heart. Due to that, I feel an obligation to help others not have to deal with what I have. I'm still working on myself. I am a small, forgotten artist who has been reminded many times over the years that money is only made from artists works after they die. I don't think that's true in every case but than again I do have Epilepsy and have had brain surgery for it so I tend to question myself. Will I continue to improve? Only time will tell. Anyway, looking forward to reading what you write.
Well, putting the art out into the world and finding homes for pictures is a first step. Then history will step in and the great, good or just cherished art will survive us all....
I love that!!! I have to agree but think that the many unknown artists that there are will sadly be lost to history. That’s why I create, not to be remembered but just for the love of it. Of course if I were remembered that would be wonderful too.
Our brains control every aspect of who we are, what we think and how we feel. I’ve a history of brain tumours and I was recently diagnosed with a Grade 4 brain tumour. It’s typical, with this type of tumour, to experience personality changes. To no longer regulate and control one’s self; to have no impulse control. To behave outside of cultural norms - characteristics we always associate with artists. This can be a form of liberation of course. Had Augustus John not suffered that terrible head trauma at age 19, would he have gone on to live the extreme bohemian existence he did, travelling with gypsies and living a life of promiscuity? I was really lucky to see an exhibition of Augustus and Gwen John’s work at the Tate Britain way back in December 2004. The styles of the siblings were quite different - Gwen’s more restrained, Augustus’s far more extrovert. I still have a brochure for the exhibition in which Augustus is quoted as saying that he and his sister’s art was “the same thing really”. A revealing comment - often the person living with the brain trauma just does not see how it is manifested.
I heard about your situation only recently and was very sad to think of your life being impaired and the situation of your family. You've been an incredible tower of strength to us who rejected the lockdowns and associated restrictions. Your activism has really heartened many of us and I know that people have got to know of my work through your comments and recommendations. I am incredibly grateful and say a prayer for you every Sunday.
About AJ, yes, it really is a fascinating question as to what his future might have been had he not had that head trauma. I know that people talk about that in relation to Hemingway too, who suffered a number of head injuries during his life. His medical history no doubt played a part in his output but it doesn't explain away what I consider to be his genius.
Thank you so, so much for your kind words and prayers. Honestly, it means a great deal to me. I’m down here in Australia, a long way from home, and I struggle with all the classic ex-pat neuroses and sense of disconnection. The online community we have is hugely important to me and I’ve been moved by the warm wishes I’ve received. I don’t have a huge YouTube channel (just very a small one that focuses on art and popular culture), nor am I active on Twitter. I just float about this online community and I love to read, and comment on, the great work that is produced. I would like to make more content but, as is often the case with women, family commitments take up most of my time. And sadly I’ve been ill most of this year.
I think the power of art is often overlooked by the ‘online right’. I’ve great respect for yourself and John Dee for bringing art, especially modern art, to the fore. Dee’s series on Andy Warhol (on Academic Agent’s channel) was the best study of the artist’s life that I’ve ever seen. As you know, modern art enrages some sections of the right although, as Bowden himself pointed out, what we class as modern art has already been around for well over a century.
As you demonstrated in your video on Bowden for Academic Agent, it has immense power. Bowden understood that. He literally embodied it. The anger in his work jumps from the page and punches the observer in the face - ‘Against Greenpeace’, ‘An Apple A Day Keeps Fury at Bay’, ‘Too Many Turkey Twizzlers’ - he’s not exactly sitting on the artistic fence!
I’d argue that he couldn’t have been the firebrand orator he was without his art. I’ve been binge reading books on Bowden and his art whilst in hospital; it remains as powerful now as when I first encountered it.
I’m just finishing a long round of treatment for this tumour, then we have a break to allow it to work/not work, then my neurosurgeon will do some more MRI’s to see how things stand, Hopefully we have managed the problem for a bit longer. Often with brain tumours and injuries, the best one can hope for is to manage the problem and buy more time. I’m always reachable here on Substack or by DM on Twitter (I haven’t been posting but I do check DM’s). Please take care of yourself Alexander, it’s always a joy to read your work and comment with you. God bless x
God bless you too. You always give me so much to think about in your comments. I never feel I can do them justice in the reply! x
Thank you, I’ve just been bingeing on Bowden so he was in my mind -apologies if I rambled on a bit!! Please take care of yourself, you can always reach me here, God bless x
This was so interesting to read, and I did not know John, Stuart, and de Kooning suffered in the ways they did. It’s a fascinating question that I have never considered and you’ve given me much to think about. Thank you.
Trying to separate art from a broad range of “mental illnesses” is, indeed, a fools errand, after all is it not true that true high art, at least in some of its greatest expressions, demands suffering? One would be hard pressed to call Dostoyevsky, Turgueniev or Torquato Tasso (or any number of writers and artists for that matter) “completely mentally healthy individuals” and yet they were not truly mad either, rather their suffering and their rather odd personality’s and minds gave them insights into the human soul that the more “well tempered” minds of the world maybe would have never grasped if it wasn’t for the commitment of the writers to place those thoughts and stories into the written words of books to begin with…
I think modern western society thinks too much and as a result understands far too little of everything, for example: they see “persons” that is individuals with actual personalities (even if “maladjusted”) and see that these “persons” don’t fit the idea of “individual” as the current society finds acceptable(that is a commodified and for all practical purposes interchangeable human) and thus the society deems what in any other age would be deemed an odd but otherwise normal person into a “mentally ill and unfit individual”, this goes from everything from artists, writers, and even the average person, this is a major reason as to why the modern world lacks the presence of many geniuses which in other times were rather common in comparison:
“Where are the good poems? The good artists? The great writers? The grand philosophers of our age?” You may ask and the answer is: “the poet has been miserable and on several opioids while working an office job, the dreams of the writer were quashed in high school and he now is nothing more than a bureaucrat, the artist who made good art was found to be ‘too antiquated and unremarkable’ by the artistic world and now lives in the street selling canvas to sustain himself, and the philosopher? He’s either in a cabin in the woods or in a mental hospital”
This was an interesting read for sure. I don't think that they had the proper information about many medical conditions in the past. Take Van Gogh for example to assume any of his actions had to do with Epilepsy alone is rather idiotic if you ask me. He was on very toxic medication that HAD to have had side-effects. I highly doubt the medication he was on is legal today as his conditions were treated with mercury, arsenic and iodine. They were EXTREMELY toxic and would turn ANYONE crazy. It was simply amazing that he wasn't even worse off if you ask me. He also did not have Epilepsy alone and many things probably contributed to his behaviour. His case is actually a rather amazing one because I simply cannot understand how he got through that being poisoned to that extent. Thats NOT mentioning the fact that many are scared of what they don't understand even today. Many fear the brain, which is interesting because there have been multiple cases showing that people who have had brain trauma often get better. Some show little to no reactions, some are in the middle, yet some DO become rather unable to do almost anything. It really all depends but to only think of that persons art is wrong. I love art, don't get me wrong there but a persons life matters too. These people should not simply be remembered for the products their art has created but what they lived through. The money that can be made by their art is wonderful but Lives matter too! That fact should always, always be noted. In my opinion, the fact that in many of these times, medications came with HORRIBLE life threatening side-effects should be noted and it wasn't here. You aren't the only one who has left that historical information out of the picture helping countless people to be judged by a society that fears what they don't understand. What they thought of as medication in Van Goghs time, we know today was poisoning. That should be noted, otherwise it makes certain conditions seem much worse than what they really are and increases the likelihood that those with similar conditions will be judged based on false information or a lack of historical facts. These people did not go through what they did to be remembered for their medical conditions alone. Even today, depending on your medical condition, man-made drugs come with side-effects. I know when I was growing up, I was put on medication that actually killed some and was taken off the market. I was lucky to live. That is VERY rare today though because side-effects are often less traumatizing to the human body. If people are going to note the behaviour of those in the past, they should note the fact that side-effects of certain medications also contributed in many many cases! If not, you are giving the public the wrong information because those today do NOT have to suffer as much as they did. Cases like mine are RARE as I had up to 100 seizures in high school and was actually on 3 medications 3 times a day. It's a great thing that I'm not that bad off today but that does not stop judgement. Sadly, I know from personal experience that those today should NOT be judged by the behaviour of those who suffered in the past. The medical field has learned at least some things so patients aren't poisoned to that extent. I wasn't even poisoned to THAT extent. Mercury, arsenic and iodine DO come with some HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE side-effects! It wasn't until the mid-twentieth century that mercury compounds finally fell out of favor, thanks to a solid understanding that heavy metal toxicity was harmful. You also did not mention Frida Kahlo who's health no doubt had alot to do with her works. Still, that fact did not make her works property of anyone else. Artists are people before painting, singing, etc. Even if art is infact the love of their life. I love reading about other artists but please for those suffering today, consider not passing on information that helps them to be judged.
Thank you for your insight, Angela. It is easy to become infatuated with technical explanations and to pathologise the creative process - and life in general - which can strip people of their agency. You are quite right that medication can easily have as many side-effects as neurological conditions.
Van Gogh's case is very famous and has been covered by writers more expert than me, so I decided to omit it and go with some lesser known figures.
I think I should do a few more articles in this vein and follow up some of the points you raise. Thanks again.
You are absolutely welcome. I would LOVE to read any articles that you may write on that topic. It's HUGELY interesting to me. To write about the differences or things they have found since Van Goghs time would honestly make your writing stand out. At least I think that it would. It would also help those like myself not to be judged as I tend to worry whenever my health acts up that someone will put me away. Although it's kinda obvious that I can infact think, trust me when I say that some assume otherwise. I remember that laws today would not allow anyone to put me anywhere without my permission yet I STILL worry. My point, you are right to an extent. Certain meds, treatments, surgeries can emotionally harm. You should see some of the art I created in the past. It's like Fridas, which I don't know if that's so good. She was, is and will always be a huge inspiration to me. I even made a self-portrait inspired by her painting Diego and I created in 1949. Mine is a bit different, I put a heart on my forehead to show my love of the world. My other works often show my progression from brain surgery in 2003. At the time of my surgery, I kind of doubt they even knew that a brain can actually heal. Only recent studies have proven that in many cases. I just don't get those works out all the time because I'd rather paint it and let it go. Here's a video of me talking about my situation Please note that this was years ago and I no longer attend that show. Even if it's free money wise to do so for those in my health, the fact is is they make money from the pity others show from it. I'd rather be known as the professional artist I am...anyway here it is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ZptPQEgdiM I also post my therapy works on Halloween. As seen in that video, my surgery or at least ONE of them was not easy. I usually don't go into detail though. The whole point of that form of art is to heal from it. People don't know that they are based on real life unless I tell them anyway. Many find it too sad but in reality I'm not a sad person. It all depends on how you look at it. Again, you are absolutely welcome. The reason for my mentioning what I have is due to the fact that societies judgement has broken my heart. Due to that, I feel an obligation to help others not have to deal with what I have. I'm still working on myself. I am a small, forgotten artist who has been reminded many times over the years that money is only made from artists works after they die. I don't think that's true in every case but than again I do have Epilepsy and have had brain surgery for it so I tend to question myself. Will I continue to improve? Only time will tell. Anyway, looking forward to reading what you write.
Well, putting the art out into the world and finding homes for pictures is a first step. Then history will step in and the great, good or just cherished art will survive us all....
I love that!!! I have to agree but think that the many unknown artists that there are will sadly be lost to history. That’s why I create, not to be remembered but just for the love of it. Of course if I were remembered that would be wonderful too.